She stands before her easel, artfully blending her paints on
the brush and again as she strokes the canvas; the odor of turpentine fills the
dining room and kitchen. My mom steps back, tilting her head, and evaluates the
colors against the image clipped beside the easel. She touches her
brush to her palette, wooing her painting to be exactly as she desires it. This
childhood memory flooded back to me this week as I journeyed to Asbury's Florida campus for an intensive seminary class.
I pressed my forehead to the window as if I could actually
get closer to the artistry that was unfolding on the horizon. The whir of the plane pulsed through my skin
as I watched God perform His original masterpiece with a display of colors, weaving clouds
and light in a dramatic dance. I imagine Him evaluating His own work, whisking
a cloud with a flourish of breath to blend the light just right. Watching the sunset
six miles above the earth is like witnessing a tenderness that is almost too
intimate but invites you to intrude and see the artist at work.
Author of time ... Creator of all
The hand that paints every setting sun...*
I pulled into the parking lot at Asbury, anxious for this
new experience of an intensive week-long class wondering if the reading I had poured
over for three weeks had settled in my mind and heart enough to even begin to
formulate questions. It felt a bit like having all the paints and brushes in
front of me and staring at a white canvas with no vision of creating anything
that would convey my passions. The tree, shrouded in fog, stood in front of me in the parking lot
giving me hope that perhaps what is
unclear can still be beautiful, purposeful and delightful.
Word into flesh … water to wine
Invisible God in human form
Strength to the weak and SIGHT TO
THE BLIND…
Basic Christian Doctrine. Systematic theology. The study of
God. How is it that God is three Persons in one Being? Why did God have to
become human? How can we know that Jesus was God? Why was his death on a cross
necessary for humanity’s salvation? Who is the Holy Spirit? And where does
humanity fit into this picture? These are not new questions. These are not
unanswerable questions. I have always hungered to think deeply on the things of
God and these are questions that I have pondered at a comfortable distance, a
distance that allowed me to see the larger canvas without much necessity for
understanding the intricate details. But in this class I was challenged
to peer into the brushstrokes, to see the individual colors, like focusing on a
single tile in a grand mosaic.
And I long to know, I long to know You more...
I’m not sure why I was surprised, but in this new depth I
realized how vital it is to “love the
Lord your God with all your mind.”
With the guidance of a brilliant professor and delightful classmates, intensely
focusing on God’s known-ness, I found my love for Him growing immensely. Awe
and reverence overcame me as I was struck anew at the grandness of the cross.
Your willing exchange – my life for yours…
Oh, these are words that I have known, but seeing the brushstrokes, the choice of colors, the delicate
pinnacle on which humanity and deity exist in One for my sake caused my knees to buckle and my face to flush, overcome
with emotion as I loved God with my mind!
Holy, Holy!
Worthy of infinite honor and glory
Holy, Holy!
With all that I am, I adore Thee
Holy Lord!
Heart. Soul. Mind. And Strength. Oh, how is it that we have
decided that theology and academics are stuffy and overrated and have no passion? I have
found just the opposite. Study that exhausted my thoughts and focused me on
details that I once thought nit-picky and too complicated has generated a flood
of love for my God that cannot be contained!
Sent in His Name, You fill every void
in every direction uncontained…
HOLY, HOLY!
WORTHY OF INFINITE HONOR AND GLORY
AND I LONG TO KNOW YOU MORE!
*My friend and worship leader, Mark Roach, penned and recorded these lyrics that have allowed me to express my heart and mind in song this week. Enjoy a listen of Holy Lord.
